Making mistakes is a perfectly normal and human thing to do. However, this only applies to small things we do without thinking too much before we react. Making huge mistakes when raising a child can have detrimental effects because they can affect your children and scar them for life. Here are 5 things you must NEVER tell your child.
Saying to them that big girls/boys should not be afraid.
This is a really big lie because even the parents are afraid sometimes of something. Also you are making them to hide their true feelings and fear is not something that you should be ashamed of. Having courage and being brave is not being fearless but facing your fears when you are afraid. Instead of saying that you should try with phrases like: ‘’Everything is going to be okay’’, ‘’Don’t you worry’’, ‘’We are all afraid of something’’, ‘’You can do it’’, etc.
Saying to them that you are really disappointed in them.
These phrases come from the mouths of the parents when the children are already feeling down. It is really selfish to make them feel responsible for your disappointment. You can be disappointed in all other things, like a movie, politics or even your friends but you should never be disappointed in your children. You should be that person that is going to show them what is right. You should just try to explain what they did bad and why is that bad.
Saying to them that they are worthless.
This is maybe the worst thing that one child can hear from his/hers parents. Instead of helping them to realize their worth you are going to do the completely opposite. Those words can hunt them throughout their entire life. You should try phrases like ‘’You were unlucky today, you should try it again next time’’, ‘’Don’t you worry, nobody is perfect’’, etc.
Saying to them that they are not enough for something.
This will make them feel like they are lacking something in order to achieve their goals. They are enough to be themselves. You should instead tell them that they just need to keep practicing in order to achieve their goals and to always give their best.
Saying to them to stop crying.
Kids will start crying when they already know that they did something bad because they know that they are going to be punished. That is their emotion and because of that they cry, despite the fact that there is no particular reason for them to cry. You should instead try to tell them that it is okay to cry, but that after doing something bad, they are not going to fix that problem with crying.